Many people have told me as I have prepared to serve a mission that as it came closer it would just get harder and harder. I believed them, but didn’t quite understand what they meany by that. As I have a total of thirty days left I can say I finally understand what they meant by that. The closer it gets, the more I doubt, the more I panic, the more I worry. Some days, I just don’t want to go. It’s not that I don’t think it will be the most wonderful experience, that I don’t know that I am supposed to go or that I made a commitment to go. It’s just…terrifying. I am going. I will love it. But, for now, I am scared. Actually, terrified. Unprepared? Perhaps.
All I know for sure is that I love the gospel. I know that it is true. It makes me happy. It completes my life. I know that serving a mission is what I need to do. It is something that I can’t wait to do, even if I have moments of doubt.